EVENTS: book launch for THE PARADOX OF PORN in New York City September 22

One big event of the summer season for me was the publication of my new book, THE PARADOX OF PORN: Notes on Gay Male Sexual Culture.

Based on my twenty years of experience as a sex therapist/educator and pleasure activist, this book-length essay explores the topic of pornography from a unique, specifically gay male perspective, surveying in depth what’s valuable and what’s problematic about the ubiquitous forms of erotic imagery we encounter on a daily basis.

My intention in writing the book is the same one that drives my professional practice: to encourage and support gay men in having more pleasurable and more satisfying sex. I would like to share more widely the questions, discoveries, curiosities, and wisdom that I encounter every day of my working life.

The book has been receiving some gratifying positive attention. Kirkus Reviews, which is aimed primarily at libraries and booksellers, called it “A relatable, timely analysis of pornography’s history and its effect on the mindset of the gay community.” The Bay Area Reporter said, “Given how pervasive porn is in the gay male world, it’s encouraging to read a thoughtful and clear-eyed analysis of how it impacts and shapes our sexual lives.” The Advocate published an excerpt from the book, and Edge Media interviewed me, calling the book “an enlightening and useful meditation on pornography.”

Some writers I admire have offered words of praise. Michael Bronski, author of A Queer History of the United States, said “The Paradox of Porn is the best book about pornography, the lives and imaginations of gay men, and state of erotic gay culture written to date.” Novelist Andrew Holleran called it “sane, helpful, and fascinating.” Journalist and commentator Jay Michaelson said, “Don Shewey’s book is wise, informed, and fearless. The Paradox of Porn busts through several closet doors and explodes taboos. A rich and rewarding read.”

I hope you’ll check it out for yourself and let me know what you think.

If you’re in New York on Saturday September 22, I invite you to join me in celebrating the publication of The Paradox of Porn at a book launch event called “Written on the Body/Queer*Sex*Life” at the Bureau of General Services Queer Division, the bookstore located in Room 210 at the LGBTQ Community Center, 208 W. 13th Street.

I will be appearing with my friend Ishmael Houston-Jones (above), the super-talented dancer-choreographer who has just published his terrific first book, FAT and other stories: some writing about sex. We will be reading from our work, answering deeply personal questions, and selling and signing copies of our books. I’ll also have a big box of vintage porn to give away. The event starts at 6:00 pm with an informal reception. The reading will begin at 6:30, and we will be done by 8:00. Please come!

If you can’t join us for the book launch, you always order my book online at Amazon or Barnes and Noble, though if you prefer to patronize independent booksellers, you can find one here and ask them to order the book for you if they don’t already stock it.


MEDIA: World Bufo Alvarius Congress in Mexico City

I traveled to Mexico City last month to attend the World Bufo Alvarius Congress (WBAC), bufo alvarius being the name of a toad species native to the Sonora Desert that secretes a substance that when dried and smoked creates a powerful psychedelic experience. When synthesized in a laboratory, the compound is known as 5meo-n-DMT, somewhat related to dimethyltryptamine (DMT), which is produced by the human body and many plants and is the active ingredient in ayahuasca. The gathering in Mexico City July 27-29, 2018, was the first of its kind to assemble in one room a few hundred people who had all experienced this sacred medicine – “the indigenous peoples, the practitioners, the scientists, the anthropologists, and the psychonauts – the now-global toad family whose lives have been touched by this most powerful of entheogens,” as the website described the target audience. “Join us for three days of lectures, panel and group discussions, and films by the leading experts in this nascent field…to address the pressing issues of toad conservation, ethics, best practices, and sustainable alternatives, and to explore the limits of both our science and our spirituality. What’s more, it is also a much needed gathering to discuss the power and responsibility of using this unique compound, and to find ways in which we can grow as an educated and unified community.”

I attended the congress partly out of professional interest, since I’m engaged in a year-long training in psychedelic-assisted psychotherapy. But I suppose I also fall in the category of psychonaut, someone with a passionate curiosity to explore these medicines for the sake of spiritual growth and self-awareness.

My report on the gathering, “Romancing the Toad,” has just been published in the online magazine Reality Sandwich. There was a lot of useful information conveyed, and not a small amount of drama. You can read the complete account here. Check it out and let me know what you think.